lost letters : 001
4 May 2015
I would sincerely like to thank you so much for having chosen to come here to Brown to teach, because I absolutely adored and admired you as a teacher. I would also like to thank you for having the patience with me that came with teaching such a class–an beginning French class. Through all the terrible, terrible accents, falsely-conjugated verbs, wrongly-used tenses, you have managed to still guide us and constantly help us, even if our progress sometimes showed the evident signs of struggle. As for myself, I would like to apologise to you for not having been as involved, participating, and as enthusiastic as I could have. I do not lie when I say that I always looked forward to class–but I would be lying if I said that I wasn’t sometimes nervous and afraid of speaking up, because, in truth, I still feel intimidated where I am and I always feared disappointing you. Please know that I always wanted to make you proud and to make you smile. Though you were quite timid in the first few weeks of class, eventually, you grew more comfortable with us and I hope you understand that we feel the same way too, but it saddens me that we do not have any more time left.
I wish that I had gotten to know you as a good friend, something more than a teacher, because however shy you were, you were also as intriguing. Perhaps I could have went to your office hours so that we could have spoken in French about random things about our lives. Perhaps we could have had conversed more than the banal greeting, «Bonjour, ça va ?», «Oui, ça va très bien», each day that I came to class. But like I said, I do admit my fault but I do not regret anything, because I know that I would always do the same thing if life decided to repeat itself. It’s innate in my nature, and I am sorry for that.
As for today, right after I took my oral exam with you, I wanted to say some of the things that now have been written here. I just wanted give you a great thank you, sincerely, for being my French teacher, because you both deserve it and I’m positive that I couldn’t have asked for any one better. You have helped me muddle through this semester even during the times when I hated every single one of my classes except for yours. But, alas, even during today, I couldn’t bring myself to do this. And once again, I am sorry. But please know that I admire you in my deepest regard and I hope that I see you in the future as well, whether it may be here or any place else.
♥ merci beaucoup une fois plus,
ton étudiant timide,